15 What is it then? I will pray with the spirit, and I will pray with the understanding also: I will sing with the spirit, and I will sing with the understanding also.
16 Else when thou shalt bless with the spirit, how shall he that occupieth the room of the unlearned say Amen at thy giving of thanks, seeing he understandeth not what thou sayest?
1 Corinthians 14:15-16
If you say something people do not understand, they don’t know how to respond. That is what happens when you speak in the native tongue of #PTSD.
Tell them you are depressed. You may have clinical depression, but they hear depression, so they come up with what makes sense to them. They may tell you that you’ll get over it. They may suggest you out for drinks as if that would help with depression. They may suggest all kinds of things that “worked” for them. After all, everyone has gotten depressed at one time or another. They have no idea what it is like for you unless they have it too. When you are trying to explain to them how clinical depression is different, it is a foreign language to them.
If you survived something it changed you. You became a survivor of whatever caused it. It may have changed you in into a better version of yourself. That’s wonderful if it did. It could also change you into a stranger to yourself. You may look at everything in a negative way. You may feel as if things become a personal attack against you. You may be experiencing what clinicians call hyper-arousal.
Hyperarousal is a primary symptom of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It occurs when a person’s body suddenly kicks into high alert as a result of thinking about their trauma. Even though real danger may not be present, their body acts as if it is, causing lasting stress after a traumatic event.
Healthline
Tell people what you’re going through and if they have no understanding of what you’re saying, they may tell you to switch to decaf.
The thing is, if they don’t know the language of PTSD, they won’t understand you. They won’t be able to help you unless they do. They will jump to conclusions that make sense to them and stop hearing what you are saying.
It isn’t that they are against you or don’t care about you. They just don’t know how to help you stop suffering and it can be an emotional rollercoaster ride for them. They see the changes they don’t understand and they may end up blaming themselves. You’re defensive because of PTSD and they are defensive because their feelings are hurt at the same time they are worried about you.
The only way to find out what you need to be happier is to ask someone that speaks your language in their own native tongue. That could be another survivor with it. It could be a mental health professional with specialized training in trauma. If you have not been diagnosed, find a professional in your area and be evaluated by them to discover what is the cause of changes in your mind. It could be PTSD but it also could be a lot of other things other people are diagnosed with as well. Start there and then you’ll be able to understand what they are telling you.
If you have been diagnosed, find support among others and stop assuming the people in your life will understand you, or should since they know you so well. The thing is, they understood you before you became a survivor. They loved you then but are confused now. That doesn’t mean they stopped loving you. Explain what you can and find other ways to explain it to them. Also, remember that it gets stressful for them too. Helping them begins when you help yourself to heal.
There are thousands of sites, videos, and books on PTSD. Find what explains it best for you and then share it with them. You also have to face the fact that when people hear the term PTSD, they automatically think about veterans. Most of them have no clue it happens to survivors of a long list of other events and even occupations.
Isn’t it time to #BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD
