Of the many times I survived traumatic events, the suffering that came afterwards was made worse when I learned it didn’t have to happen. One of the times was on a highway in Massachusetts. Route 128 was always bad in what was called “rush hour” because it lasted for about four hours of heavy traffic. I was heading home from work in Burlington when traffic slowed down ahead of me, so I slowed down too. I was in the passing lane and everything was OK until the car behind me, didn’t slow down. He hit my car from behind, getting between the guard rail and my car at high speed, sending my car spinning and hitting the guard rail.
Terrible? Yes, but it got worse when he told me he had bad breaks. What he didn’t explain was why he decided to speed on a highway in the passing lane, with all that traffic. It he thought about anyone but himself, it wouldn’t have happened. The price I paid afterwards was friction burns from sliding all over the car, muscles pulled, a week out of work and started the problems in my back that I am still paying for today. It was my Mom’s car, so it cost her having to buy a new one and I had to buy one on my own. When I went back to work, terrifying drives to work and back again. I stayed off the highway as much as possible, especially in the winter, which meant I’d have to go the long way adding anywhere from half an hour to an hour of my commute. I still look in the rearview mirror to see who is behind me.
Abusers, with a list of others the abused. Drunk drivers who were caught multiple times but they still manage to be free and get back on the road again. Accountability helps healing because you know they cannot do it again. Rape can be made worse when you discover they raped others before you, but no one did anything afterward the others.
This is what makes Texas new law so reprehensible. Imagine being raped and discovering at 7 weeks, you are pregnant and the result of you being raped. Then imagine being told that you have to deliver the baby because it is illegal to have an abortion after six weeks. You manage to find a place out of state that will end that part of your suffering. You then discover you have to drive yourself there without any help from anyone and not being able to ask anyone to help you, or they will be taken to court by some stranger who sues them.
The other thing is, in Texas, a rapist can have rights as the “parent” leaving it up to the courts to decide.
| Texas Tex. Fam. Code ยง 161.001 2017 SB 77 | Conviction: Yes Burden of Proof: Clear and convincing evidence Context: Grounds for TPR Statute:(b) The court may order termination of the parent-child relationship if the court finds by clear and convincing evidence: (1) that the parent has:(T) been convicted of:(iv) the sexual assault of the other parent of the child under Section 22.011 or 22.021, Penal Code, or under a law of another state, federal law, or the Uniform Code of Military Justice that contains elements that are substantially similar to the elements of an offense under Section 22.011 or 22.021, Penal Code;(2) that termination is in the best interest of the child. |
If you have ever survived a traumatic event someone else did to you, you can understand what this will be like for a woman who was raped to be put through more hell needlessly. First her choice was taken away from her when sex was forced on her. Then she was subjected to having to be re-traumatized by having to tell the story over and over again. Her right to decide anything about any part of her life is all being taken away.
If you were a victim of this in any state, you do have some power now. You have the power to contact your elected official in Congress and tell them they need to stop this. They need to protect women from suffering more harm because of this attitude. Click the link above and see what is going on in your state and fight for your rights before even more are taken away from you!
Remember, it’s your life…get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD
